I feel like I’m in a tunnel. It’s dark, narrow and feels like there’s only one direction to move in. It’s cold and lonely. Last year I blogged about having tunnel vision  but in this current tunnel, my vision is limited. But I think there is gratitude to be found in the tunnel. I believe God uses tunnels to move us from one place to the next discreetly. The tunnel could be seen as a preparation period until it’s time to emerge in the light; that light could be a new job, a new area of ministry, a new relationship. Trudging through the dirt and challenges of the tunnel allow us to appreciate the light that much more.
       To get to our destination, the tunnel may be the fastest way. Making moves above ground involves the challenges of avoiding traffic and losing time from loud distractions.
       “How great is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you, which you bestow in the sight of men on those who take refuge in you. In the shelter of your presence you hide them from the intrigues of men; in your dwelling you keep them safe from accusing tongues.” Psalm 31: 19-20
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     “Hear me, O God, as I voice my complaint; protect my life from the threat of the enemy. Hide me from the conspiracy of the wicked, from that noisy crowd of evildoers.” Psalm 64: 1-2
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​      During times of war, tunnels can be used to slip into enemy territory for surprise attacks. What industry could God be getting ready to use you for a surprise attack? What industry disruption could you be getting ready to lead? And while tunnels aren’t glamorous they may be our safest journey to ensure our arrival to our destination. During tunnel warfare, tunnels are used to transfer troops from one part of the battlefield to the next while being unseen and protected.  
        “In a desert land he found him, in a barren and howling waste. He shielded him and cared for him; he guarded him as the apple of his eye, like an eagle that stirs up its nest and hovers over its young, that spreads its wings to catch them and carries them on its pinions. The Lord alone led him; no foreign God was with him.” Deuteronomy 32: 10-12
 

              Closed doors are not exciting. It is so much easier to embrace open doors and recognize the blessings in those.  But I’m finding closed doors can be blessings from God too. But I think accepting closed doors from God requires more faith. We have to trust that while what we can see behind the door looks good, God can see beyond what we can see and what’s down the line is not for our good.
            “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3: 5-6
 
            Recently, I encountered a closed door in a relationship; and I didn’t see it coming. Rather, let me say I encountered a slammed door in a relationship and I may have seen it coming if I was honest with myself. For awhile God may have been trying to close that door but I kept propping it open. In the gloss and shine of a new relationship I ignored God’s gentle hand prompting me to leave that path and guide me to a new destination; a road I would not be able to travel with that person.

          As God allowed me a glimpse behind the door He closed, I saw abandonment and myself deterring from the path He had laid out for me. And while I don’t know exactly where God’s taking me I’m sure it’ll be great for me (and you too!)
            “ ‘No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him.’” 1 Corinthians 2: 9
            So I’m not saying embracing closed doors is easy or something that happens overnight but I’m willing to fight through the pain and trust that what God has in front of me is far better than anything that is behind me.
            “Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders you have done. The things you planned for us no one can recount to you; were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare.” Psalm 40: 5
 

          A word I hear God telling me a lot is “trust.” It comes so peacefully when I’m stressing about a situation. He’s telling me to trust Him; to believe while I can’t see the outcome of the situation, He can and it’s going to work out alright.
 
       “In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.” Proverbs 16:9
 
       “The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun –scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.” Isaiah 58: 11
 
            I can really see God stretching my faith in a couple areas of my life; particularly professionally and personally. Lately I have been challenged to step out in faith. God is asking me to trust Him without seeing the whole plan. 
            Professionally I am stepping out and doing a live interview about my blog in the next month; I am very excited about the interview but also a little nervous. My six years interning and working in TV I’ve never been live; and the subject matter has never been my personal life. I just pray that I am articulate and people positively receive the message. I’m also excited for the exposure and who knows what doors God could open up in the way of my book dreams.
            From a personal standpoint I recently had a test of faith in the area of relationships.

          I was called to step out in faith and choose my relationship with God over a relationship that wasn’t honoring Him at the time (but now is!). I feel like at that moment God was asking me who do you love more me or him? What do you delight in more spending time with me or him? Now I’m not saying you can’t have God at the center of your life and a romantic relationship but I know I have a tendency to worship my relationships. Many times I’ve met someone who I thought was great and I’ll be like “Thanks God, I’m going to go enjoy this. I’ll holla at you when I’m done and need some mending.”
            Luckily after several spins in this cycle I think I’ve broken it.  By working to keep God first in my life He has helped me balance Him and a relationship. He’s shown me how He can be in the center of the relationship and how I can pray for that person and interact with him. How cool!
            This trusting thing is a daily battle and sometimes I fail but it’s great to know God has us and even when we make mistakes our best days are ahead of us.
         “As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace.” Isaiah 55: 11-12

         Trusting God is so hard sometimes; especially when we can’t see the next step.  I think the biggest area I’m learning to trust God in is relationships.  For a long time I hid this area from God as if He couldn’t see it. I thought, “You know what God I got this!” But actually He knew more than me. Duh! He can see down the line when that person is going to stop replying to texts or when they’re going to move onto someone else long before we even know what’s going on. 

            I’ve learned when we trust God He protects us from so much heartache.  When we stick with Him and keep Him involved in our relationships He reveals so much to us, and saves us so much time.  Now don’t get me wrong, there have been a few times when I could feel the Spirit telling me someone wasn’t right for me but I proceeded anyway. But God is so good when it’s all over He doesn’t say “I told you so.” He welcomes us back into a close relationship with Him.

            So I guess I’ve realized that when my relationship with God is healthy so are my other relationships.  As long as I keep God first He’ll guide me in the right direction. I’m doing my best to follow Proverbs 4: 23 which says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring for life.” (NIV)

**wellspring= a source or supply of anything, especially when considered inexhaustible.

            So if our hearts are the source of our joy and happiness let’s protect it. 

Let’s trust God, I’m confident He’ll bring us the right person at just the right time.

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1)

 
“ “For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’” (Jeremiah 29:11)